I awoke this morning to news on the BBC saying that bottle fed babies are more likely to have behavourial problems than breast fed babies and well it PISSED ME OFF!
Let me start at the beginning! When I was pregnant all I heard was BREAST IS BEST and you have to BREASTFEED YOUR CHILD, and whilst on paper that sounds wonderful in reality it doesn’t always work out that way!
I had an emergency C-section when my son was born at 2303hrs on a Monday night. I had been in hospital since 4am that morning labouring, so by the time I had him, I was exhausted! I was told straight away to try and breast feed him and NO NURSE helped me. I was left to try and work out how to get this little person to latch on!!!!!!! As he wouldn’t the nurse gave me a bottle of formula and said to give him that and we would try again in the morning.
I got put back on my ward at about 1 or 2 in the morning, at around 4am my son woke needing a feed. I was so groggy and exhausted, the NURSE actually gave me a bottle to give him, with not hint or mention or trying to breastfeed!
Whilst I was in hospital (which I might add was just 36hrs!!! which seems nuts when I had just had major surgery, so they kept telling me!) I asked numerous times for help on getting my son to latch on, without any success!
So I went home with a bottle fed baby and a Mid Wife and Health Visitor that said we can try again at home!
I have to say the thought of breastfeeding a child, actually repulses me. I have images of being a cow just producing milk all the time, I hate it. But I tried, and I even bought express pumps, both manual and electric (which just enhanced the cow image more!) to try and get breast milk into my son, because that is what the health profession says!
He did get some, but nothing I would get excited about! I had to stop trying to express within a week of coming home, due to other complications and so my son after 1 week was totally formula fed.
When I compare my feeding patterns to those of breastfed friends, I don’t understand why mother’s actually do breastfeed for so long! Luke was sleeping through within 6 weeks, he was going possibly 3 – 4hrs between feeds (in the beginning) and he developed perfectly. Now my friends, demand fed, in some instances every 1 – 2hrs through the night even and were shattered all the time. I can’t get my head round this, fine breastfeed during the day, but at night why not give the child a bottle just to get a few hours of decent sleep. I know breastfed babies don’t go as long between feeds, but then all the more reason for a bottle at night. If you choose to solely breastfeed then don’t complain about the lack of sleep! There are other options!
Now to the study and the rant!
1. If the health professionals want mother’s to breast feed why not give mother’s the help and guidance they need in order to do it, and if they can’t (because some mother’s can’t) don’t make the mother feel worthless and like she is depriving her child and she is a failure and her child will have all these issues as they grow up. Embrace her achievement of becoming a mother, who the hell cares where the milk comes from to feed the child!
2. The other thing I find odd is all this talk about how much more sickly bottlefed babies are. Well I have friends who have breastfed and there children are MORE ill than my son, so that blows that theory straight out the water!
3. I was also told by not breastfeeding I am missing out the bonding process! BOLLOCKS!!!! My son was held the same way as any breast fed baby, he was cuddled and burped the same way! The only difference, he never had some huge nipple shoved in his face, and could actually breath, look around and enjoy his milk! Oh and can I just add when all these breast feeding mothers are bonding with there child, how is the father bonding? My husband bottle fed Luke as well, and so we BOTH had the wonderful time of bonding with our son and not only that but sharing the feeding times!
This really is a rant and I am sorry but I am sick to death of these damn studies, making mother’s who don’t breastfeed for whatever reason feel that they have failed their child. As long as the child is healthy, happy, nurtured and loved, who the hell gives a damn where it’s milk came from?
(this is a personal account, and just how I see it! If you don’t agree, please don’t leave comments telling me off, it is just my opinion and I have need and right to express it!)